You shouldn't try to remember
by akebou
Summary: After Shikamaru has "killed" Hidan, he losts his memory during a mission and he stumbles upons Hidan's grave. Yaoi, lime and lemon
1. Forgotten

You should not try to remember...

Chapter 1

Forgotten

Shikamaru slowly opens his eyes. Where is he? He's on a bed, but it's not his room... everything is white. He deduces that he's in the hospital. He looks by his left side, the window is open and it's sunny outside, but there's still a few of his favorite things: clouds.

"Shikamaru?" A feminine voice calls him, snapping him out of his reverie. He turns his head in the direction of the voice. A blonde girl is sitting by his other side, looking at him. She seems worried. Who is she? Why is she worried? He tries to think, tries to remember how he got to the hospital, his body doesn't hurt... except his head...

He lightly touches his head, and finds that a bandage is wrapped around it.

"My head hurts..." Shikamaru says to the girl. "I'm thirsty." He says as he slowly sits up in the bed. Damn, now his body hurt.

"Take this, you'll feel better. You got injured on the head during a battle." The blonde girl says as she gives him a glass of water and a painkiller.

"A battle? I don't remember..." Shikamaru mutters before he takes the painkiller and the water. "Thanks."

The blonde girl looks at him, perplexed. "You don't remember the mission against the missing nins of Iwa?"

Shikamaru shooks his head. The blonde girl looks at him a moment.

"Do you remember me?" Her voice was trembling.

Shikamaru examines her, she's clearly nervous. She's rather cute... but she's a girl, if he says he doesn't remember her, she's probably cry or yell at him, but he takes a guess.

"I don't remember you, but maybe I will remember once my head heals," he replies, hoping that she won't cry.

Unfortunately, the blonde girl began to sob. "I'm Ino, your teammate... do you remember anything at all?" She says like if she was about to burst into tears.

It's a shame girls have to be so annoying...

Shikamaru frowns and he looks outside, thinking. "Hum... from what you've said earlier, my name is Shikamaru..."

Ino sits on the bed by Shikamaru's side. "You know where you are?"

"I guess I'm in an hospital, since I got injured during a battle," Shikamaru replies nonchalantly.

"I mean... do you remember what's the name of the village?" She's trembling.

"What's going on? Why are you trembling? I said I will remember when I heal, you don't have to worry about me. I'm Shikamaru and I'm in the hospital. I like to watch clouds and play shogi." He says, still looking at the clouds.

"With Asuma." Ino says with a smile, thinking she was completing the sentence of his comrade, thinking he was starting to remember.

"Asuma?" Shikamaru looks at her, confused.

"You... you don't remember our Sensei? He sacrificed his life for us!" Ino says, shocked.

".. I'm sorry..." Shikamaru looks at his hands resting on his lap. He tried to reassure her, but he failed. Now she's crying. Damn... it's even worse than before...

Ino began to be hysteric. "Do you remember your parents? Or Chouji? He's your best friend! And Kurenai? You promised to protect her! And Tsunade? She's..."

"STOP IT!" Shikamaru yells, holding his head with his hands. "I don't remember anything, alright? Please leave me alone for a moment..." Ino stays by his side a moment before she leaves without a word.

How could he forget about such important things? His name, his parents, his friends... He looks at the clouds, he remembers looking at them for so long, maybe that's why he still remembers that part of himself. At least he didn't forget everything. He will remember one day, he will definitely remember... he must remember...

XxXxXxXxXxX

A week passes since the day Shikamaru woke up at the hospital. Many people visit him, he slightly remembers a few people like Chouji or Kurenai, but he doesn't remember most of them. He remembers that he's a ninja, a jounin and he starts to remembers a couple of ninja techniques and taijutsu.

Shikamaru is now at his home with the people Ino told him were his parents, even if they feel like total strangers to him. His head still hurts and most of the time, he plays shogi with his father or watches the clouds when his mother doesn't bother him to do the laundry...

Shikamaru takes another painkiller. "Damn, my head is killing me..." He says to himself as he touches the scar on his forehead, walking to the living room. He sits in front of the shogi table and stares at it, lost in his thoughts.

"_Why is the only thing I really remember is playing shogi? Maybe I played too much in my past life... my past life, it sounds like if I got a new life since I got injured... I was playing shogi with my teacher, Asuma. I remember shogi but I don't remember him..._"

He hears his father return from the grocery and his mother calls for him, but he doesn't listen. "_My teacher sacrificed his life for me, my parents have been with me since I was born, why don't I remember them? Tsunade-sama, the great medic-nin and the most powerful ninja of the village... Kurenai, I promise to our dying teacher to protect her and their child... I don't remember any of them... The__ only thing I can remember is clouds and the damned shogi!_" He stands up and kicks the shogi table, upset, it goes flying into a corner.

"Shikamaru?" His father is standing at the door, looking at him, but Shikamaru passes by him.

"I'm going." The young jounin simply says, he doesn't even bother to look back at him.

"But the dinner is almost ready!" He heard his "mother" yells at him from the kitchen.

"I'm not hungry!" Shikamaru answers back at her before he enters the Nara forest.

The Nara forest, the only place where he can find peace and quiet to think. And no one will bother him here. This forest is the only proof he has that he really is Shikamaru Nara, because nobody can enter in the forest without permission except a Nara.

He walks for a moment before he comes upon an area where the ground has been disturbed recently.

"_I wonder what's buried there, no one can enter in this forest..._" Shikamaru thinks as he crouches down and examines the ground.

To be continued...

Thanks to sunshinelexi for beta-reading!


	2. Curiosity

Chapter 2

Curiosity

_"What I'm doing? There's like a 10% chance that something important is buried here. I could relax and look at the clouds instead of digging and probably found nothing interesting,_" Shikamaru thinks as he digs with his kunai. Yea, he's a lazy ass and being curious isn't like him, but he has to know. Maybe it's something about his past?

Digging the hole is pretty easy, since it seems like it was buried not so long ago. It doesn't take long before Shikamaru has to jump down the hole. "_I hope I'll find something interesting, it's really deep._" Shikamaru thinks as he continues digging.

After a moment, something shiny catches his attention and he picks it up. It's a metal lighter. Alright, someone comes in the Nara forest, digs a hole about 6 feet deep and buries a metal lighter. Great, just... great. He puts the lighter in his pocket and is about to get out of the hole when he sees a tuft of what looks like silver fur. He crouches down to get a better look. "What's that?" Shikamaru grips the silver fur and pulls on it.

He pulls so hard, when he finally manages to take it out, he falls backward. When he opens his eyes, he looks at what is in his hand: a head.

He screams in disgust as he throws the head against the wall of the hole.

"OW THAT FUCKING HURT!" Someone yells. Shikamaru is alone in the forest, who could be yelling?

The young jounin looks at the head lying in the bottom of the hole when suddenly, it open his eyes. Bright, deep amethyst eyes are looking at him.

Shikamaru freezes in horror. He was prepared to find anything, even a corpse, but he wasn't prepared to find a talking head. How could he know that he would find that sort of thing? It's not even logical!

"FUCKING SHIT YOU ALMOST SCALPED ME IT HURT LIKE A BITCH YOU KNOW?" The head yells back at him.

"A nightmare, it has to be a nightmare... I will wake up soon." Shikamaru says to himself, holding his head in his hands.

"IT'S NOT A FUCKING NIGHTMARE YOU FUCKING JERK!" The head is angry, but Shikamaru doesn't care, since a head by itself isn't dangerous.

Shikamaru looks back at the head lying in the bottom of the hole. It seems so unreal... "Why are you still alive?" Shikamaru asks to the head as he pokes him on the cheek.

The talking head frowns. "I'm fucking immortal! _He doesn't remember?"_

"Who are you?" Shikamaru's reply confirms Hidan's doubts.

The head stays silent a moment before he replies, more calmly, "I'm Hidan." He's so confused. Why does Shikamaru doesn't remember him? He killed his teacher and Shikamaru buried him not so long ago! Well, that's what Hidan thought...

"Who buried you there and why?" Shikamaru asks quietly.

"I'm not sure..." The young boy in front of him really looks like the bastard who buried him... but he has no idea who he is... maybe a lot of years passed and this boy is one of Shikamaru's descendants...

"You're not sure? You mean you lost your memories?" Shikamaru sighs. This is great. He digs up an amnesic loud-mouthed immortal dude who cannot even help him. How lucky...

"Hey! Can you let me out of this hole? Pretty please, with sugar on top?" Hidan snaps him out of his thoughts.

"I don't think it's a good idea..."

He will pay for this... "What you would says if you was amnesic and buried in a fucking hole for Jashin know how long, someone found you, and he doesn't help you because he doesn't know you? I bet you would be FUCKING pissed too!"

"No."

"Hun?"

"If I was buried and in pieces, I will be dead. So if someone found me, I wouldn't be pissed, I'll be dead," the young jounin explains.

Hidan bites his lower lip and frowns. "Fuck you."

Shikamaru bursts out laughing. It was the first time he laughed since he woke up at the hospital. He decides he likes to make fun of the immortal guy. He's the only person who doesn't look at him in pity or reproach him for forgetting about... well, almost everything from his past life.

"You won't let me rot here, will you?" Hidan says, giving a 'nice' smile.

Shikamaru smiles. "Don't worry, I'll dig you up."

XxXxXxXxXxX

Shikamaru lays the parts of Hidan's body under a tree near the hole. It's the first time he's ever dug up a body that has been blown into pieces, well he thinks so anyway...

"Hey, does it matter if you're missing some of your... organs? I don't know if they're all in you or if some of them are still buried..." Shikamaru asks, hoping he will not have to search for Hidan's kidneys or anything like that. It would be so gross...

"Hun? Ah, it doesn't matter. I will heal fast anyway."

Shikamaru sighs, relieved. "Alright." The young jounin stands up. "I will return soon."

"I thought you'd bring me to your home! _What if a wolf wants to eat me? Oh yeah, there's no wolves here, it's the Nara forest, so having wolves around could be dangerous for the precious little deer living here._" Hidan looks around him, almost hoping the deer doesn't remember him as well. Great, Hidan, the s-rank criminal and Akatsuki immortal member, is now afraid of deer...

"I don't think my parents will react well if I brought home an anmesic immortal stranger I found buried in the forest," Shikamaru explains, snapping Hidan out of his thoughts.

"Yeah, that's right. _Maybe his father is that Shikamaru bastard. He would return me to the grave in that case... or worse. It's surprising, I was in that hole for so long but I'm not skin and bone yet..." _Hidan thinks as he listens to the sound of Shikamaru's footstep as he returns to his home.

XxXxXxXxXxX

Hidan is back on his feet before sunset... well, not really back on his feet, but in one piece at least. His stitches are still too weak for him to be able to move without breaking them. He has to wait a few hours until he's completely healed. Shikamaru makes him sit under the tree and lean against it.

"I bet you're hungry. Here's some of my mom's cooking," Shikamaru says as he gives Hidan a bento. The jashinist smiles from ear to ear, as if he just saw his beloved god of destruction in the food Shikamaru just gave him.

"Fuck yeah!" Hidan yells, literally ripping the bento from Shikamaru's hands. "Dear Jashin-sama, I swear I will never whine again about being hungry. I think I've never been so damn hungry before!" Tears of joy fall down his cheeks as he starts to engulf the meal.

Shikamaru sighs. "At least you could thank me..."

Hidan looks up at him, his mouth full of rice and his eyes full of stars. "Mhmmm!"

The young jounin cannot restrain a small laugh. "I guess it will be alright. You should not be eating so fast, it's not a competition you know? By the way, you never told me your name..." Shikamaru remarks.

"I'm Hidan. You?" Hidan says, still eating his meal as if he was trying to achieve a new record of speed.

"I'm Shikamaru Nara." The jounin replies nonchalantly.

At that name, the Jashinist chokes on his food.

"Hey! I warned you not to eat so fast!" Shikamaru quickly stands up and hits Hidan's back a few times, worried. "You'll be okay?"

"_Okay? OKAY? Jashin-damned! What the fuck is going on?_" Hidan panics.

"You didn't remember who buried you there, but you still remember your name. You're lucky," Shikamaru comments.

Hidan didn't reply, looking at the young boy's forehead. "What's that?" He asks, pointing at Shikamaru's scar. "Hun? Oh, It's the scar I got from a battle. That's how I lost my memory."

"Oh.. I see..." Hidan calms down. "_He thinks I didn't remember who buried me here not because I was confused about him, but because I'd lost memories... You're right Shikamaru, I'm so damn lucky._ So you lost your memory too, hun?"

"Yeah, because of my injury. Do you remember something else than your name?"

"Hmmm... maybe I will remember later..." Hidan says as he continues eating, trying not to laugh.

"That's what Tsunade told me, too. She said I'll remember later, when my injury heals. I guess it's the same thing for you, even if you didn't lose your memory because of an injury. A good sleep will probably be beneficial for both of us. Digging you up was exhausting." Shikamaru stands up and stretches.

"Yeah maybe..." Hidan says.

"See ya tomorrow!" Shikamaru tells before he turns his back to the 'amnesic' albino.

XxXxXxXxXxX

Hidan lies on the ground, looking up at the stars as he tries to fall asleep, but something on his mind keeps him from sleep. "I wonder where Kakuzu is... Surely with the Akatsuki, with another partner, counting money and being a miser, like before... _before me..._" Hidan frowns. What if Kakuzu didn't remember him? What if he died? God, he will miss that miser... but for now, he has a new toy to play with...

To be continued...

Thanks to sunshinelexi for beta reading!


	3. Playing

Warning! Lemon, swearing

Chapter 3 Playing

Shikamaru woke up early at the morning, before the sunrise. He didn't sleep well, thinking of the immortal guy he had found in the forest the day before. How can that guy be immortal? And what the heck he was doing, buried in the familial forest? So many questions... but the man's amnesic, just like him... That sound like a new challenge: find the link between the forest, the lighter and the immortal guy.

"Hi mom!" Shikamaru says as he enters the kitchen.

His mother looks at him, surprised. It's really his son, waking up early and joyful? Something must be wrong... "Are you alright?" She asks, worried.

"A little sleepy, but I have things to do. I'm going in the forest, it help me remember." That was not a lie. If the immortal guy is in the Nara forest, he surely knows the Nara and will probably help him remember something. Two heads work better than one, even if one of them isn't really bright... At least, he can think as he looks at the clouds, unlike training.

The young man takes a bagel and holds it between his teeth as he takes another bagel for Hidan and takes his vest. He leaves the house in hurry, trying to put on his vest with one hand and waving his other hand at his mom, still puzzled.

XxXxXxXxXxX

Hidan didn't want to kill him yet, he wants to play with the bastard who had blown him in pieces and buried him. His wounds are already healed. Dear lord Jashin, it feels good to be back in one piece again! They sit at the base of a large tree, looking at the sky between the dark green leaves. Looking at the sky between the leaves isn't like looking at the clouds, it much more boring...

"I can't watch the clouds here; you should come with me into the village. I just have to say you're a traveler." Shikamaru says nonchalantly, it would be a good idea if Hidan wasn't the s-rank criminal who killed a jounin a few weeks ago...

"I don't think it's a good idea..."

Hidan's reply make Shikamaru confused "Why? I'm sure it will work; they don't know you and you're amnesic anyway."

Hidan retains a laugh. The deer boy really believes he's amnesic? Well, it helps him when Shikamaru asks him why he was buried and he replies he doesn't remember. Now, how to persuade him that going to the village isn't a good idea without saying he's a criminal who killed his teacher?

He thinks a moment before he replies "Exactly. I don't remember. So what if I was a criminal? I don't remember it, but they probably do. I will get punished for something I don't even remember? That's not fucking fair, don't you think?"

Shikamaru is amnesic, so he can easily imagine himself in Hidan's situation. What if he woke up in the enemy's village, what if they tortured him to get information he wouldn't remember? That would be hell...

Shikamaru sighs. "Alright, so try to remember..." He pulls out the metal lighter he had found a few moments before he found Hidan's head. At the sight of the 'deadly weapon' used to bury him, Hidan froze.

"Do you know what it is?" The younger man asks as he approaches the metal lighter near Hidan's face, who moves back by reflex, exactly knowing what that Jashin-damned thing is. "You look afraid of it." Shikamaru remarks and he frowns.

"No no no... It's just... you almost fucking put it in my face! _Play the amnesic, Hidan..._It's a lighter, why do you ask?" Hidan give him a faintly fake smile, nervous.

Shikamaru, still lying on his back, pulled back the lighter, this time holding it near his face to examine it. "I found it buried with you, there should be a link between that lighter and why you were buried."

That damn brat... "You think too fucking much! You believe somebody buried me with a lighter? What if you had found a Jashin-damned bento box? I got buried because I finished somebody's food? It just a fucking coincidence." Hidan laid back, his arms under his head. Shikamaru acts like if he doesn't notice the nervousness on Hidan's voice. It's almost like if he's afraid of a simple lighter... They stay silent a moment, looking at the tree above them. Shikamaru cannot see the clouds as much as in the village... "It's boring here..."

"If you was buried for Jashin-knows-how-long, you would be able to appreciate being free. Feeling the wind on your skin and the grass beneath you." Hidan smiles, closing his eyes just have a better feel of freedom and brush the grass under him with the back of his hands. Damn he missed how good it feels to be free.

The young Nara smiles. No, Hidan can't be hiding something, he's way too simple minded... "I bet you missed the sun too..."

"I fucking hate the sun. I always get sunburns, sunstroke or sun-whatever, that fucking hurt." Hidan's replies making Shikamaru laugh.

The immortal dude has a crude language and isn't really a good role model for Shikamaru, but he's funny... and pretty good-looking...

"_What am I thinking about? Men shouldn't be good-looking, I'm straight!_" He quickly look at the man lying by his side, his silky silver hair was well combed, as always, a serene smile on his soft lips, his beautiful captivating amethyst eyes and his fair smooth skin... "_Well... I think I am straight... was I? I don't even remember if I was straight or not!_" Shikamaru held his head between his hands and growls in frustration.

Hidan looks at him, perplexed. "Are you alright?_Does he notice something?_"

"Hun? Oh... yeah, don't worry! Just... thinking too much..." Shikamaru gives him a fake smile to reassure him. "_He worries about me..._" The deer boy thought, as he laid back, his arms crossed behind his head. Instead of trying to look at the clouds between the leaves, he decides to looks at the leaves moving in the wind. It almost likes looking at the clouds...

XxXxXxXxXxX

When he returns at home, late in the evening, Shikamaru go straight to his room, ignoring his mother questions. She's troublesome. Why does she always have to know where he was, what he was doing, why he doesn't come back for supper? That's none of her business, he's sixteen years old! He can do whatever he pleases without informing his mother of all his deed; he's old enough to decide by himself.

He doesn't really know why he cares about an amnesic random dude; maybe it's because he seems like the only one who doesn't bother him with 'you were not like that before' or 'I can't believe you don't remember that', always accompanied by sad looks or sobs. He continues to watch clouds and play shogi just like before, so it means his behavior hasn't changed just because of his lost memories, right? Maybe they don't know him as much as they think... or maybe they want to make him believe he's someone else... "_No, no, why they would do that? There's no purpose..._" He undressed and untied his hair, letting his dark raven locks fall on his shoulders as he lies down on his bed, his arms crossed behind his head and he looks around him. His room is really clean, everything has its place; his kunai on his commode, his jounin vest and backpack on his chair, a picture frame of his team on his end table... His team... This picture is a proof they didn't lie to him...

He takes the photo and examines it. The boy on the left is himself; he has the same hair style since he was young and the same bored look on his face. Yeah, that's definitely him. The girl in the middle is Ino for sure, she's still wearing purple but her hair is longer. The chubby kid on the right is Choji with shorter hair. What the fuck is on his head? Look like underwear... Shikamaru sighs. The only one he never saw is the bearded man behind them, who he assumes to be their sensei: Asuma.

"What the fuck happened to you?" Shikamaru asked the picture, almost expecting an answer. Unfortunately, inanimate objects don't talk. He places the picture on his end table.

The metal lighter, the bearded man who died for his village, the amnesic dude buried in the forest, the mission... what a drag... and who the fuck is 'Jashin'? Why can't thing be simple? If only he had written a personal diary or something like that... Maybe he should start... but tomorrow, now it's time to do his favorite thing: sleeping.

It's a beautiful hot and sunny day. This forest is his favorite place now; he can be quiet and look at the green leaves dancing in the wind with a guy as lazy as him: Hidan. He's lying on his back with his arms crossed under his head, like usual, and Hidan's sitting by his side, looking down at him, a smile on his face. "Why are you looking at me like that?" Shikamaru asks, curious.

"You're cute when you're thinking." Hidan laughs.

Shikamaru blushes. Is he just laughing at him or is it a real compliment? He really thinks he's cute? Shikamaru shook his head and resume looking at the leaves. Hidan can't possibly think he's cute, they're both men. He's straight... well he should be straight...

It's starting to get cold, even if it's a beautiful summer's day. "That's weird..." He mutters.

"What?" Hidan asks, still looking at him with his beautiful amethyst eyes.

Shikamaru tries to ignore the weird feeling on his stomach. "The weather... it was hot and sunny just a second ago, and now it's cold... but still sunny..."

"I can heat you up..." Hidan offers as he gets on top of him, his face just an inch away from the younger's man's face.

Shikamaru blushes but didn't pushes the other man away from him; the albino's body is so hot. "What are you...?" He doesn't have time to finish his sentence, because Hidan kissed him.

He doesn't react; his mind is still trying to understand what's happening. Hidan deepens the kiss, earning a moan from the younger man as he lets his hands explore his body, hands sliding under his shirt.

"You like it?" Hidan whispers in his ear with a deep husky lust-filled voice. His hot tongue played across Shikamaru's torso and it tickled when he licks his belly button. Hidan gently pulls down the deer boy's blue boxer above his knee as he licks his hipbone, making Shikamaru shivers in anticipation. He knows what will happen next. He grasps the grass under him as he feels Hidan's wet tongue sliding along his member before he takes him in his mouth.

He remembers what Hidan told him earlier about the grass. Yeah, freedom feels good and Hidan is a part of his freedom. With him he doesn't have to worry about the village and nobody told him how he should act to be 'like before'. With Hidan, he can simply be like he wants to be and nobody will scowl him or make him feel bad about not remembering his past life. Hidan's his own freedom... the air is cold but Hidan's mouth around him feels so God damn hot. He bucks up his hip and Hidan sucks him vigorously.

He was about to come when the cold wind woke him up, he forgot to closes the window.

A dream... Shikamaru sighs. It will never happen, dreams are made for sleeping. He mentally curses himself as he stand up to close the window. He lazily returns to his bed, this time pulling a blanket over him. At least he's fixed now, even if maybe in his 'past life' he liked girls, now it's pretty obvious he's not straight...

XxXxXxXxXxX

The day after, Shikamaru was about to leaves his house when the door bells ring. He grabs his bento and his backpack, ready to leave once he answered the door. "_It's probably Choji or Ino's father coming to talk and drink with my 'father'..._" To his surprise, it's not the friends of Shikaku, but his own 'friends' Choji and Ino. He doesn't have time for this, he almost didn't sleep last night because of his dream... the only thing he wants is to be with him.

"Shikamaru! What where have you been these last few days? We haven't seen you! Where were you?" Ino questions him. She reminds him his mother...

What a drag... Before he cans reply, Choji asks him if he wants to look at the clouds with him.

He thinks for a moment, what he could say to make them leave? "Hum... I have... I want to be alone for a moment, to think about all that, you know... it's very difficult for me, I have to try to remember my past." He lied, clearly not trying to remember anything now that he has tasted the happiness that Hidan brought him.

"We can help you?" Ino offers cheerfully.

"NO!" Shikamaru says a bit too harshly, but he calms down. "I mean... no. I think way better when I'm alone in a quiet place."

They seem disappointed. How sad... Just kidding, he doesn't mind. "I have to go." He replies before his teammate could think of another reason to keep him in the village.

Once he finally joined Hidan, he gently laid his backpack on the ground.

"You bring me food? I'm so damn hungry!" Hidan says happily, a smile on his face.

"You're always hungry!" Shikamaru laughs as he hands him his bento box. He blushes as he remember his dream, but shook his head, he can't think about that right now. He opens his backpack and takes out a shogi table.

Hidan winces "You remember how to play this? _Damn I hate this game..._" The younger man smiles. "Yeah, it's one of the few things I remember, I used to play with my sensei..." At the mention of Shikamaru's teacher, Hidan froze. "But I don't remember him." Shikamaru's continue. Hidan sighs. Few...

The first game was quick and as expected, Hidan lost. He blames the birds for distracting him, cursing them for being so loud and threatening that he will eat them if they don't shut up. It has been a long time since Shikamaru laughed that much... Hidan simply smiled, the younger man is a much better companion that Kakuzu, who was always insulting him when he would lose a game of shogi...

"Did you remember anything new?" Hidan asks as he replaces the pieces of shogi on the game board.

Shikamaru thinks a moment before he replies: "I found the picture of my team on my end table. Maybe they were not lying to me after all; I'm really a part of this village."

Hidan smiles and he put his arms behind his head. "Maybe it's an illusion; don't forget you are in a ninja village."

"Why would they do that?" Shikamaru frowns.

"I don't know, but it's weird, don't you think?"

"What?"

"You remember how to play shogi, but you don't remember the person you play with."

That's true, it's weird... but at the same time, he slightly remembers the bearded man explaining something about the king... Protecting the king on the shogi game and protecting the king in real life, but the king in real life isn't the feral lord... He sighs... What a drag...

The day passes calmly, playing shogi and looking at the leaves dancing in the wind. When he returns home after the sunset, Shikamaru see his 'father', waiting for him in the front door. "Having fun playing shogi alone in the forest?" Shikaku asks, with his deep masculine voice.

Shikamaru looks at him a moment, examining him. What tells him that he's really his father? Sure he looks like him, but nothing assures him that he's really the person they affirm he is... The picture on his end table can be a fake; after all, it's a ninja village...

"It more calm in the forest than here." He replies, distrustful. Shikaku frowns but didn't replies as he watches his son go to his room.

To be continued...

Thanks to dark-angel-I for beta-reading!

**This story has been posted 1st may 2012... Did you watch the eps 271 (Road to Sakura) posted on narutoget recently (27 july 2012)? Yeah, Sakura lost his memory after a battle... just like Shikamaru in my story! I laughed so damn hard when I watched the episode XD especially when Kiba says to Shino "You're the first one she'd forget.", Neji had to be tied and blindfold and Shikamaru had to act like a retard (with a smile) XD**


	4. You shouldn't believe in fairies tales

Chapter 4 You shouldn't believe in fairies tails...

Warning! Lemon, swearing

As usual, Shikamaru woke up early. He rapidly dresses up, takes his backpack and goes to the kitchen to take his bento box. When he enters the kitchen, he saw his mother cooking breakfast and his father sitting at the table, reading the newspaper. It smelled good... pancakes?

He waited a moment, wondering if he should take the breakfast with his 'parents' before he goes back to the forest. He really likes pancakes... but it felt awkward to sit with strangers in order to eat pancakes... It hasn't been 2 weeks since he woke up at the hospital, he passed the first weeks there and it's been almost 4 days since he digs up Hidan. He comes home only to sleep and eat the lunches his 'mother' does for him (and Hidan). If they feel like strangers, maybe it's just because he doesn't pass enough time with them...

The soft voice of his 'mother' snaps him out of his thoughts. "Do you want some pancakes? It's been a long time since you haven't eaten with us..."

"Can't you see it's no use? He's in a rush." Shikamaru's father replies. He didn't even look at him, still reading his newspaper.

Finally, maybe it's better if he just joins Hidan, Shikaku somehow was afraid of him, with his bad-ass look and all his freaky scars...

"Sweet heart, why are you in such a hurry?" Yushino looks up at him, worried.

"I'm not in a hurry; I just want to enjoy the day. It's nice outside and I like to be calm in the forest looking at the leaves and playing shogi." He tried to reassure his 'mother'. He took his bento box and he left quietly. He doesn't know that woman could be so... gentle?

Once he was gone, Shikaku chuckled. "It's not like you to be nice. Usually, you were always yelling at him to move his lazy ass and help you with the laundry." This comment earned him a pan brutally thrown in his face.

"I'm trying to be nice because I want him to see me as a good mother, dubass! You should be acting more like a father too! No more pancakes for you!" She yells angrily at her husband, her hands on her hips.

Yushino looks at the window and calms down, anger leaving only to be replace with sadness. From her house she can see the Nara forest, where her son seems to pass the most of his time, alone... "It's terrible to say this, but I feel like... like my son is dead and somehow... somebody else took his place... I don't recognize him..." Her voice cracked, she was retaining her tears. What if her son never comes back? What if he has changed forever?

XxXxXxXxXxX

"You didn't bring the shogi game?" Hidan asks the younger jounin when he joined him in the forest. He kind of felt relieved that he didn't brought it, he hated that game anyway.

"No; I don't want to play shogi today." He explains as he lay down, his arms crossed under his head. He remembered yesterday, when Shikaku gave him a weird look when he asks him if he had fun playing shogi alone... "_I shouldn't have bought that game here... It could give me trouble..._" He shivered when he remembered the look his father gave him yesterday. "_Damn, if he gives me that look just because I'm playing alone in the Nara forest, I hope I don't talk when I'm sleeping..._" He thought as he remembered his dream about Hidan.

"Why are you blushing?"

Shikamaru looks at the albino, his amethyst eyes looking intensely at him, just like in his dream. His face became deep red as he stutters; "I-I-I do-don't blush!"

His embarrassment made Hidan smile. "So cute, maybe we could pass time a different way than before..."

The young jounin doesn't have time to question upon what Hidan was talking about, he quickly had his answer when his albino friend bend over him and kiss him. It wasn't like in his dream; gentle and soft... No, it was passionate and eager.

He was shocked for a moment, not knowing what to do, but when Hidan gave him a slap on the buttock, he jumped in surprise. Shikamaru pushed Hidan away from him. "What are you doing?" He almost yelled, even though he knew exactly what Hidan was doing. Hell, he had dreamed of it last night...

"Don't tell me you don't want it." The older man whispered in Shikamaru's ear as he grinded his hips against him. Hidan kissed him again as he let his hands caress the younger man's round cheeks under his pants. His skin is so soft... just like a girl. Shikamaru shyly wraps his arms around Hidan's strong shoulders and he lets his friend pull down his blue navy pants along with his boxer.

He lets out a moan when Hidan grips his erection, slowly pumping it. The Jashinist smirks "You're a virgin?" he mutters with a husky voice. Dear lord Jashin, he loved virgins, especially when they are his prey.

Shikamaru stays silent, except for some moans of pleasure. He doesn't remember if he liked boys or girls before his accident, so how could he remember if he was a virgin or not? He guesses he was… he's only sixteen years old after all...

The feeling of Hidan's tongue licking the inside of his thighs dragged him out of his thoughts. The albino licked along the already hard member, from the base to the tip, before he takes him in his hot mouth, earning a loud moan of pleasure.

The older man held his hips in a dead grip, as if he was afraid Shikamaru would change his mind, but he wouldn't... That's not a dream. Hidan is giving him a taste of freedom. He would never imagine it could feel so good, it's better than in his dreams. He looks down at Hidan, his beautiful amethyst eyes clouded with desire and looking at him as he lets his soft, hot tongue lick the slit of his dick. It's clearly not his first time doing this. He was about to cum when Hidan stopped, earning a soft growl of protest from the younger man.

"Don't be so impatient, I have to prepare you or it will hurt." This is something Kakuzu never cared about, that boy is kind of lucky. If the jashinist hurt him, Shikamaru probably wouldn't want to do it again, Hidan had to take care of his toy if he wanted it to last longer. He doesn't know when he would regain his memories. He retains a laugh; hell, he want to see the face of the younger boy when he will remind who he is and what he did to his sensei. Hidan licks his lips as he slowly slides his fingers inside the younger man under him. It hurt at first, but the young jounin forgot the initial pain when Hidan's finger brushed against a bundle of nerves inside him and let out a cry of ecstasy.

"You like it don't you?" Hidan whispered huskily in Shikamaru's ear before licking it. The younger man's only reply was a loud moan of pleasure.

"Get on your hands and knees." Hidan said as he sat on his heel, waiting for Shikamaru to get on all four, a smirk on his lips. The young jashinist lower his pants and boxer just enough to free his rock hard member, stroking it a few time to lubricate it with his precum before he press it to the other man's entrance, slowly entering him. It hurt much more than fingers, but Shikamaru already knew it and he didn't really care. He's sure the older man would soon find the bundle of nerves he had hit a few moments ago, making him forget about the pain. As expected, it didn't take long until he found Shikamaru's prostate, making sure to hit it with every thrust.

Shikamaru moaned loudly, this was pure delight. Every time Hidan bumped against that sensitive spot inside him, he felt like he's about to faint. At that moment, Shikamaru feels more alive than he can ever remember. There's no village, no lost memories, no head injury. Just. Pure. Ecstasy.

"Scream my name Shikamaru..." The younger man's erection twitched against his stomach at the sound of Hidan's voice calling his name. He happily complied to Hidan's demand, hoping this moment would last forever.

"Ah... Hidan..."

"Again." The jashinist panted heavily, feeling his orgasm near. That boy is a dirty pleasure, a reward Jashin-sama gave him after all these weeks he passed buried alive. Jashin-sama forgave him for losing a battle, allowing him a moment of pleasure after all this pain... and the young boy had no idea of this when he screamed Hidan's name loudly one last time as he climaxed, his insides clenching around the other man's member, making him come a few moment after with a soft grunt.

XxXxXxXxXxX

Shikamaru returned at home before dawn and he went in his room to take some clean clothes before he can go wash himself. He drops his backpack on the floor next to his bed and crouch down to unpack his things when he sees a box under his bed. Curious, he picks it up and opens it; it's full of pictures of his team and a pack of some pictures of him playing shogi with Asuma, his team at the BBQ with a pink haired girl and a blonde dude... he saw them one day when he was at the hospital, the girl used to change his bandage on his head and the blonde dude is hyperactive and annoying, but overall funny.

The bearded man always has a smoke in his mouth on the pictures. Maybe the pack of cigarettes is his, so it was not a lie... He kept Asuma's cigarettes after he died. Wait a minute... Asuma was smoking... so the lighter... Suddenly, he heard his father talking to some people in the hallway, he recognized the voice of his teammate and he quickly pushes the box under his bed a few moments before Choji and Ino enter in his bedroom. "_They can't knock, like everyone?_" Annoying...

The blonde girl smiles at him. "Hey Shikamaru! How are you?" Is she always so damn cheerful?

"A bit tired... what are you doing here? It's almost time to supper." He says as he stands up.

"We think that maybe, if you want, we can go at the BBQ restaurant together, just like before! What do you think?" Choji asks him.

What a drag, the only thing he wanted now is to take a shower and go to sleep... he shouldn't had return home. Shikamaru signs: "Alright, just wait here, I have to go to the bathroom." He picks up clean clothes and removes his jounin vest, he doesn't need it anyway and this vest is damn heavy...

Once he leaves the room, Ino looks up at Choji, a smile on his face. "I think he feels better! Don't you think?"

Choji nods: "Maybe going to the restaurant we went the first day with Asuma will bring him back some memories." Ino smiles and lays down on Shikamaru's bed as Choji looks at some pictures of his team on Shikamaru's end table. At least, even if Shikamaru is a lazy ass, he's still as organized as before.

Something brilliant catches his attention and he picks it up. A metal lighter. What? Shikamaru bought another lighter like the one Asuma gave him? No, why he would do that? He doesn't remember him and anyway, it doesn't look new at all... He remembered what Shikaku told him a few moments ago, about Shikamaru playing shogi in the Nara forest.. alone...

"Hey, I'm ready." Shikamaru's voice make Choji jumped in surprise and he promptly put the lighter in his pocket. It can't be Asuma's lighter... Can it?

XxXxXxXxXxX

As they were waiting for the food, Choji and Ino started asking him if he remember this or that. He knew they only want to help him, because they're his friends, but it's no use. He really doesn't remember a single thing, sometimes, he doubts he was the person they think or want to make him believe he is... He sighs "Except the thing about the king at shogi, I don't remember anything." He says as he crosses his arms behind his head.

"The thing about the king? Ah... yes... Asuma told you to protect the king, you remember it?" Ino asks.

_Protect the king... He was holding a man in his arms, the right half of his face is burned and blood is spilling out of his mouth. "I never even beat you once at shogi... Ah, yes... Remember our talk about the king?"_

_I'm the knight, Asuma is a sacrificial piece. The King isn't the Hokage or the feral lord._

_"I'll tell you who it is. Come closer."_

_The King is the children that will claim the future of the village._

Shikamaru didn't reply to Ino's question, looking at his bowl of rice, thinking.

Choji frowns. "That's all Hidan's fault!" The deer boy finally looked at his teammate, interested.

Hidan? He knows something about him? "Why do you say that?"

Choji was surprised of his question at first. Shikamaru really doesn't remember a single thing... He sadly looked at Ino for help. The blonde girl sighed. Why does everyone look sad when Choji mentioned Hidan?

"If Asuma was still there, you wouldn't get injured during that mission and everything would be alright. Nothing of this would have happened if that crazy bastard didn't kill him. Hidan is the member of Akatsuki who killed our teacher during a mission. He's a S-Rank criminal and he's immortal, but you managed to bury him in the Nara forest so he wouldn't hurt anyone anymore."

Ino felt sad to remind him something this important, but it's nothing compared to how Shikamaru felt right now. He was about to believe everything Hidan told him, about his friends lying to him... but he clearly remember the bearded man on the picture of his team dying in his arms, asking him to protect the King... There's no doubt his friends are telling him the truth, how could they know about Hidan being buried in the forest if it was not true?

The man who killed his teacher is the one he had dreamed about. He's the one he had spent his days with, he had given him his lunches... and the S-rank criminal who kill his teacher is the man he had slept with a few hours ago.

Shikamaru went blank as he trembled.

"Are you alright?"

"I...I have a headache... I think I start to remember some things..." Ino smiles happily but her smile vanishes when Shikamaru suddenly stands up. "I have to go... I don't feel good..."

Shikamaru runs to the Nara forest, retaining tears that were threatening to fall on his cheeks.

Hidan lied! "_What I should do now? I slept with the guy who slaughters my teacher! Asuma-sensei died for us and I fucking slept with his assassin!_" He falls face to face with Hidan, sitting under a tree. "Already missing me? How cute." The albino smiles.

"You lied to me!"

His smile fainted. Shikamaru finally remembered? He smirked. "And what will you do about it? You liked it and you don't remember them, why do you care?" The s-rank criminal enlaced the younger man and used his best sexy look, but to Shikamaru it feel like Hidan's looking at him like if he looks at his next prey.

"You want to do it again hum?" He smirks; "You want me to take you?" Hidan mutters before he licks Shikamaru's neck.

Shikamaru pushes him away; "Don't tell me you didn't even have feelings for me!"

His former best friend and lover laughed out loud; "I only love Jashin-sama!" Hidan yells, "He's the only one who'll always be by my side, the only one who's as immortal as me, I once thought I could be forever with Kakuzu.." He frowns before he continues; "but you took him away from me, fucking bastard!" Hidan boils with rage, his fists shacking. He looks down at the deer boy sitting in front of him, a scared look on his face. So this is who 'Jashin' was... the god Hidan's living for, the god Hidan's killing for...

"Burying me is worse than just killing me, it drove me insane... No light, no food, nothing, just fucking pinch black! I didn't torture your teacher, I just send him to Jashin-sama, you're way more sadist than I am! I don't love you and I've never loved you. I just wanted to play with you... just trying to make you suffer as much as I suffered. Yes I killed you teacher, maybe you loved him, but what you did was way crueller!" Hidan screamed. How much he loved the delicious painful expression on Shikamaru's face...

He was waiting for that reaction for so long, and now Shikamaru finally realized that he had slept with his teacher's killer. The little boy thought they were lovers and now his little heart is broken? How sad. Hidan didn't retain his maniac laugh. He cherish moments like this, when his prey is in pain, even if it's just psychological pain. It gives him delicious shivers running down his spine, but he doesn't have much time to enjoy the moment, he heard peoples coming their way. "Fuck! That little shit told them I was here?" He runs in the opposite direction of the footsteps. He had been buried for so long and passes his last week sleeping and watching the clouds; he doesn't have a chance to win against a well-trained ninja, even if they're 'just kids'.

Choji and Ino join Shikamaru few moments after Hidan's dismissal. The deer boy's still keeled on the ground and looks... downcast...

Worried, Choji crouches down next to his friend: "Hidan's not here?" He asks him gently.

"No he's not_... that's not a lie..._ I came here only to remember... Hidan killed our teacher..." He mutters quietly.

"Yeah he's a freaking psycho!" Ino exclaims happily, her friend finally remembered!

Shikamaru ignored her, lost in his thoughts.

"_That's true; I'm way more sadist than he is... Seeing it like this, Hidan just killed our sensei because he loved his god... he killed our sensei because he wanted to show his god how much he loved him..._" Shikamaru thought, looking up the cloudy sky. "_Unfortunately, he doesn't love me... There's no happy ending...after all, fairy tales don't exist..._" He felt tears fall down his cheeks, but he doesn't care... his mother should be worried about him, it's better if he went back home...

End!

I hope you liked it! (Yeah, always sad ending... but you don't really thought there will be a nice cute fluffy love story between a sadistic psychopath like Hidan and the student of the man he has killed while he was laughing like a freak? Hm?)

Thanks to for beta-reading!


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